silencing humans

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mpteach
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silencing humans

Post by mpteach » Wed Dec 24, 2003 12:44 pm

Im an engineerng student, i know how to silence my pc. When its quiet all i will hear is my parents and i dont know how to silence them.

Any suggestions?

Zyzzyx
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Post by Zyzzyx » Wed Dec 24, 2003 1:19 pm

Duct tape.
[b]Z[/b]
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Rusty075
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Post by Rusty075 » Wed Dec 24, 2003 1:28 pm

Duct tape is for wimps.

Use staples. :lol:
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Zyzzyx
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Post by Zyzzyx » Wed Dec 24, 2003 1:42 pm

Superglue.
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1398342003
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Post by 1398342003 » Wed Dec 24, 2003 4:26 pm

Bullets.

sbabb
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Post by sbabb » Wed Dec 24, 2003 5:04 pm

Nothing so drastic is necessary.

Sneakiness and subterfuge will win every time:

"Mom, Dad, I've come to the realization that the only way I can really focus and concentrate on my studying is if it's either very quiet, or if I have death metal cranked up to 11 on the stereo. I've been trying the 'quiet' route, but it really doesn't seem to get quiet enough around here. I'm thinking that the death metal thing may be the way to go, though, because there's this hot goth chick in my class who tells everyone to call her 'Skank' and she's really into guys who crank death metal. She has a chrome stud through her tongue and she says that she wants to show me all the cool things she can do with it. If I had a Harley, I know she'd be mine..."
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GamingGod
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Post by GamingGod » Wed Dec 24, 2003 5:16 pm

dude could you get me that girl phone number? Id love to know what she can do with her tounge ring :D
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1398342003
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Post by 1398342003 » Thu Dec 25, 2003 12:54 am

And give up on Natalie Portman?

GamingGod
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Post by GamingGod » Thu Dec 25, 2003 6:47 am

who said anything about giving up on natalie portman?, but seriously. I found a girl and i happy with just her, awww, isnt that sweet.
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Post by Ralf Hutter » Thu Dec 25, 2003 6:47 am

1398342003 wrote:And give up on Natalie Portman?
Or your shiny new girlfriend?
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Post by Jan Kivar » Thu Dec 25, 2003 6:53 am

Great timing, Ralf and GG... :lol:

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Post by aristide1 » Sat Jan 03, 2004 9:32 am

Which brings up another subject, how do you silence a Harley?
People who put money and political ideology ahead of truth and ethics are neither patriots nor human beings.

Tom P
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Post by Tom P » Sat Jan 03, 2004 10:18 am

You want to make your parents speechless? Tell them that you are going to start paying your own tuition! Okay, maybe I'm assuming something wrongly, but am on the other side of this situation right now, hee-hee.

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Post by Ralf Hutter » Sat Jan 03, 2004 11:47 am

aristide1 wrote:Which brings up another subject, how do you silence a Harley?
Weld a length of chain on it and use it as a boat anchor.
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GamingGod
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Post by GamingGod » Sat Jan 03, 2004 11:58 am

damn ralf, not a fan of the harleys?
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Post by Ralf Hutter » Sat Jan 03, 2004 12:06 pm

GamingGod wrote:damn ralf, not a fan of the harleys?
Nope. I've ridden and raced Rice Rockets for the past 25+ years so I have a soft spot for them.

I'm a road racer at heart and if a bike can't lean over at least 45° without dragging some part of it on the ground, I'm not interested in it.
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Post by Trip » Sat Jan 03, 2004 2:32 pm

I've seen a few car races, but never bike races.

Y'know how the front of the car flies up when they start? Do bikes have that problem?

I can't figure how the car racers know where to drive, I'm always sure to be way over to the side!

Sometimes the front doesn't come down for a good bit heh I've heard of a car flipping that way too. You racing people are nuts.

Back when I just got my first car, my best friend actually wrecked my car trying to speed along a backroad. Heh, I was in the passenger side, mad as fire - $3000 of damage!

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Post by sbabb » Sat Jan 03, 2004 11:46 pm

aristide1 wrote:Which brings up another subject, how do you silence a Harley?
Buy a different bike.

Harleys of old had a timing defect that gave them their distinctive sound. Nowadays they put that defect in intentionally to make sure that the sound is the same. If they balanced the engine "correctly" the sound would be much abated, but then it "wouldn't be a Harley."

I've always been amused by the guys who say "chicks dig a guy with a Harley." OK, buddy, you have her straddle a 1200cc bike, lean forward, then start up that vibrator. And you think the GUY has anything to do with it? :roll:
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Post by frosty » Mon Jan 05, 2004 12:23 pm

I'd use a small quantity of GHB, you know the date rape drug, then once out, clean the top and bottom areas of the lips with alcohol, the same kind you use on a heatsink, then using a needle and some fishing line, you can use pink or other hot colours if you prefer, and so them mouths up leaving a wee lil hole for a stray so they can suck down malts and protein drinks.

Hope that helps

cheers


:}

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Post by GamingGod » Mon Jan 05, 2004 3:29 pm

your one sick sucker
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Jan Kivar
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Post by Jan Kivar » Tue Jan 06, 2004 4:02 am

Taping a whole roll of industrial quality duct tape around the heads could be quite sufficient for a short time... :lol:

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Post by aristide1 » Tue Jan 06, 2004 4:36 pm

damn ralf, not a fan of the harleys?
Well I have yet to have a single one tell me why I can't watch TV in my own home without being disrupted. Tell them to be quiet, and they scream you are trampling on their rights, but it's totally OK for them to trample on my rights.

In general they may be nice people but when it comes to quiet respect the typical harley rider is nothing but a hemorrhoid
People who put money and political ideology ahead of truth and ethics are neither patriots nor human beings.

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Post by Trip » Wed Jan 07, 2004 9:24 pm

Have y'all noticed how loud cars driving by are? and neighbors too! Zalman headphones, how well do they work?

I've been in the process of moving into a friend's apartment, but the neighborhood is too dang loud. It looks like I'm going to be studying in the library again this year, which is fine. The big thing is I'll have to start buying my food again :shock: . Heh, I've been living in my parents' house for the last few months 8) .

s_xero
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Post by s_xero » Thu Jun 14, 2007 10:27 am

I'd keep my parents in a pool of blood... Not too long of course, otherwise I'd make my own food.

I guess they'll shut up then - for a moment.

And the blood? Where I'd get it? My French *Fraumensch*/teacher I think.

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Re: silencing humans

Post by smilingcrow » Thu Jun 14, 2007 2:11 pm

mpteach wrote:Im an engineerng student, i know how to silence my pc. When its quiet all i will hear is my parents and i dont know how to silence them. Any suggestions?
Try inserting an 80mm Nexus fan into their mouths.
Note. You may need to use a 92mm on your mother as since women speak a lot more than men her jaw may be more flexible.

fri2219
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Re: silencing humans

Post by fri2219 » Thu Jun 14, 2007 10:03 pm

mpteach wrote:Im an engineerng student, i know how to silence my pc. When its quiet all i will hear is my parents and i dont know how to silence them.

Any suggestions?
One thing that works (without question) on people- alternate terminal electronic acceptors.

Just fill a room with whatever you choose to use, and the all the people in it will get very quiet.

Sylph-DS
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Post by Sylph-DS » Fri Jun 15, 2007 1:44 am

Well, you know, water to humans is like volts to a fan, so all you need to do is cut their water supply down to just the right amount, and then eventually, they'll get really really silent.
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YugenM
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Post by YugenM » Sat Jun 23, 2007 6:37 pm

aristide1 wrote:Which brings up another subject, how do you silence a Harley?
RPG-7. It'll be loud for a couple of seconds, but you'll never hear it again. Make sure the rider is on it when you blow it up to high heavens.

God damn, I hate Harleys and the vast majority of people who ride them. As if they're not insecure enough, they have to ride the noisiest brand of bikes on the planet and act like utter assholes.

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Post by peteamer » Sun Jun 24, 2007 12:33 am

[i]In my eyes[/i]: YugenM wrote:God damn, I hate Volvos and the vast majority of people who drive them. As if they're not insecure enough, they have to drive the ugliest brand of car on the planet and act like utter assholes.
:D

nick705
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Post by nick705 » Sun Jun 24, 2007 1:13 am

YugenM wrote: RPG-7. It'll be loud for a couple of seconds, but you'll never hear it again. Make sure the rider is on it when you blow it up to high heavens.

God damn, I hate Harleys and the vast majority of people who ride them. As if they're not insecure enough, they have to ride the noisiest brand of bikes on the planet and act like utter assholes.
I've passed on your observations to my good friend "Slug." Once the PCP has worn off and he's calmed down enough to be let on the plane, he'll be coming to Vancouver to pay his respects.

/edit: actually, most of the time he's a 42-yr-old investment banker called Andrew...

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